Archive for June 7th, 2005

Vicarious Spamblogging

I haven’t done any spam blogging in a while, although I do have some samples in cold storage. But one of my coworkers was kind enough to share some of his spam with me, and it’s a doozy.

Subject: Re: 25 mg did the tricck

Preview text:

Hello, Myself, I have the honour to be Irish, sir. My name is Bloodhis lordship’s, and stood squarely before him. The medical skill of Bridgetown was summoned to their aid. PeterEngland? Oh, and there’s more to it than that, even. D’ye thinknegroes,…

What? What??? Do I think Negroes what? Dude, don’t leave me hanging like that! And what kind of name is “Bloodhis lordship’s”? Is that really Irish? Oh well, I’m sure it’ll be continued in the main e-mail itself, and all will be made clear. Let’s just see here…

Hello, do final details of which all that need concern us is an understandingyou want to spend Iess on your meddications? Our new great ofwith suddenly lengthened stride.fer – Saparticularly as whilst they discussed and fumed and cursed two moreve over 75% with PhAnd then, from out of this uncouth pack of savages that beset them,armacyByMail Shop Vlrock-bound harbour. He roared out the question in his mind.AGRA ClALlleave to ask your lordship (his brogue became more marked than ever)S VALlrains being newly ended.UM LEVlTRrebels-convict, his eyes considering them, his lips pursed. BeforeA and many other.
With each purrchase you gtowards it, I confess; and you’ve shown your quality in doing
TopNow don’t be rash. My men are within their rights, as you are quaIity Best priceeven as his fingers closed upon the hilt, the other’s closed upons Total conturned to say good-bye to Miss Bishop, who was already mounted. HefidentiaIity Home deIiveropportunity of doing so.y
P.S. Try us and you will not be disappointednecessary to bribe a gang of scoundrels to depart from obedience!

Hmm… Did you notice the overwrought period novel subliminally hidden in the words “PharmacyByMail”, “VIAGRA”, “CIALIS”, “VALIUM”, and “LEVITRA”? It’s pretty subtle, so I have cunningly used italics to make it easier to spot.

I need to start working “you will not be disappointednecessary to bribe a gang of scoundrels to depart from obedience!” into my everyday conversation…

Cue watertiger to taunt me with goofy spam names. I shake my fist pre-emptively at your aunties.

2 comments June 7th, 2005 at 06:29pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Favorites,Spamoptikon

Ideological Purity Gone Wild

The Republicans are eating their own again…

Sam Brownback (R-Dobsonia) has placed a hold on Bush’s nomination of Julie Finley to the Organization for Security and Cooperation in Europe… because she’s pro-choice.

As WaPo observes,

Mrs. Finley’s opinions on abortion, whatever they may be, have nothing whatsoever to do with European security and democracy, peacekeeping in Chechnya, or the enforcement of arms control treaties, the main issues of concern to the OSCE.

A standup comic once claimed that Keith Richards’ role in the Rolling Stones was to make Mick Jagger look healthy. I think Brownback is one of many Republicans whose role in government (or outside of it, for that matter) is to make Bush look moderate and sane. And if they can turn the U.S. into a combination theocracy/kleptocracy in the bargain, so much the better.

On the other hand, if some Chechen terrorist finds a way to turn aborted fetuses into WMDs or an army of very small zombie warriors, Ms. Finley’s ideological blinders may prevent her from reacting quickly enough to the gathering danger. Best to be prepared for every eventuality.

June 7th, 2005 at 05:02pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Bush,Religion,Republicans,Wankers


Second letter down – Mankiw’s response to NYT’s piece
about income inequality:

Your chart about the percentage of income earned by the top 0.1 percent of taxpayers was fascinating, but “Richest Are Leaving Even the Rich Far Behind” failed to draw the obvious conclusions from it.

The data show that the rich take a rising share of income when the economy is booming, such as during the 1920’s and 1990’s. Their share declines when the economy hits hard times, such as during the Great Depression and the most recent recession.

The rich took their smallest slice of the economic pie during the 1970’s – a period when productivity growth was low and unemployment and inflation were rising.

Here’s the lesson: If policy makers’ primary goal is to reduce income inequality, they should put the economy through the wringer. But if they want economic prosperity for all, they should avoid focusing on the politics of envy.

Oh, I see. So income inequality is the sign of a healthy economy, and should therefore be encouraged, or at least celebrated.

Or maybe it’s because the people closest to the bottom can’t really fall much farther when the economy goes kaflooey…

Maybe a rising tide really does lift all boats – but if you don’t have a boat, you’re shit out of luck. God, I hate these people.

June 7th, 2005 at 12:57pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Republicans,Wankers


Why does Barry Posen hate America?

Insurgencies and counterinsurgencies are, above all, intelligence wars – for both sides. Insurgents are invariably at a disadvantage in terms of troops and firepower. They survive only if they have superior information, which they derive from broad popular support. This support – whether voluntary or coerced – allows them to hit, run and hide; to kill and survive to kill again. Their effort collapses when their opponents possess superior information.


The insurgents have very good information. Many reports suggest that they have operatives within the Iraqi security organizations and bureaucracies…. Assassinations of Iraqi government officials, including senior security officials, and ambushes of security forces reveal a formidable intelligence apparatus. Car bombs seem to be regularly directed at American convoys; the insurgents must know their routes and their schedules.


In terms of collecting intelligence about the insurgents, things are no better. Since the Iraqi election, American officials have treated the news media to stories about how much more information Iraqis are providing. This may be true, but it is not nearly enough. In late March, just before the recent flurry of bombings in and around Baghdad, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld told reporters that his “metrics” and “indicators” were improving. It is clear then, that the recent bombing campaign, which has killed more than 700 people, was a surprise.


Those who wish to “stay the course” in Iraq need a plausible strategy of victory in the intelligence campaign. The usual methods either have not worked or are unlikely to work. Unless the American and Iraqi government forces can deprive the terrorists of their local supporters and the intelligence they provide, they are in for a long, indecisive struggle.

I’ve got a fever! And the only prescription… is more torture!

(No, I don’t think Posen is advocating that – but it’ll be spun that way.)

June 7th, 2005 at 11:38am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Iraq,Torture,War


Kristof has another column on the ungodly nightmare that is Sudan, and President Bush’s manly, resolute inaction in the face of it. I’m going to shy away from the money quotes about mutilating and killing children – check it out for yourself if you want to be appalled.

Last fall President Bush declared the slaughter here in Darfur to be genocide, and then looked away. One reason for his paralysis is apparently the fear that Darfur may be another black hole of murder and mutilation, a hopeless quagmire to suck in well-meaning Americans – another Somalia or Iraq.

I think Kristof is giving Bush too much credit here – I think Bush just doesn’t give a damn because Sudan has no terrorist strawmen, oil, or any other lucrative war profiteering opportunities.

If Mr. Bush led a determined effort to save Darfur, there would be real hope for peace here – plus, the international image of the U.S. would improve. And a new Zogby poll commissioned by the International Crisis Group found that Americans by margins of six to one favor bolder action in Darfur, such as a no-fly zone.

But Mr. Bush is covering his eyes. Last year administration figures like Colin Powell and John Danforth led the response to Darfur, but now neither Condoleezza Rice nor the White House seems much interested.

Darfur will never be a Somalia or Iraq, because nobody is talking about sending in American combat troops. But simply an ounce of top-level attention to Darfur would go a long way to save lives.

In 1999, Madeleine Albright traveled to Sierra Leone and met child amputees there, wrenching the hearts of American television viewers and making that crisis a priority in a way that eventually helped resolve it. Ms. Rice could do the same for Darfur if she would only bother to go.

Mr. Bush values a frozen embryo. But he hasn’t mustered much compassion for an entire population of terrorized widows and orphans. And he is cementing in place the very hopelessness he dreads, by continuing to avert his eyes from the first genocide of the 21st century.

Shouldn’t the evangelists be pressuring Bush to do something about this? Aren’t they supposed to care deeply about this sort of thing, and the Culture Of Life and stuff?

In any case, I don’t want to hear another word about how Compassionate Liberator Bush had to invade Iraq to save its people from Saddam’s brutality.


June 7th, 2005 at 09:23am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Bush,Republicans,War

And There Was Much Rejoicing…

36 today.

*half-hearted hooray noises*

Will have to go and buy myself a toy at lunchtime.

12 comments June 7th, 2005 at 09:00am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Coolness

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