Archive for August 17th, 2005

I Sing The Vagina Electric…

I celebrate the me yet to come…

Well, the NY Daily News certainly was on a roll today, capped off with a most excellent compendium of Bizarre Sex Trivia (actually excerpted from “Why Do Men Have Nipples: Hundreds of Questions You’d Only Ask a Doctor After Your Third Martini” by Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg, M.D.). F’rinstance:

“The Electrovaginogram: Study of the Vaginal Electric Activity and Its Role in the Sexual Act and Disorders.” In this paper, the authors investigated the hypothesis that the vagina generates electric waves, which affect vaginal contraction during penile thrusting. They found electric waves could be recorded from the vagina. They also postulated that there was a vaginal pacemaker that seems to represent the G-spot, which is claimed to be a small area of erotic sensitivity in the vagina.

Also covered: Whether or not you can break your penis, what causes “shrinkage,” kegel exercises, and female ejaculation.

It is also definitive proof of something I’ve been saying for a long time now: Anything containing the phrase “So what is this vaginal Loch Ness Monster?” is worth reading.

This also seems like an appropriate, er, spot to disclose that my blog can apparently be found by searching for “Kingpin hitting boobs Vanessa”. I don’t think I want to know why.

10 comments August 17th, 2005 at 09:46pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Eli's Obsession With The Google,Weirdness

Geek Out! Le Geek, C’est Chic…

My time has come at last!!!

Good news, losers: It’s cool to be uncool. With the upcoming releases of two new movies, “The 40-Year-Old Virgin” and “The Baxter,” and the recent success of “Napoleon Dynamite,” Hollywood has gleefully embraced dorkdom.


Throughout pop culture history, protagonists were required to have ripped abs or bulging biceps. Now in these films and TV shows like “Beauty and the Geek” they simply need a “Hello! My name is Myron” name tag. It seems that, more and more, the ladies love Geek Chic.

“Women find sex appeal in male geek movie characters,” notes Gitesh Pandya, editor of “Geeks have charm in their awkwardness. The personality of a geek makes him sexy, partially because he can be pitied and partially because they are good-natured people.”


“When people see these characters, they feel good about themselves,” says Pandya. “If a geek can succeed, then there is hope. It gives the audience confidence.”

“They’re always putting their foot in their mouth,” says Showalter. “There’s something cringe-worthy about them that makes us laugh, but while we’re laughing at them, we’re also rooting for them.”


“Superhero films are more about escapism,” notes Pandya. “Films about geeks are about realism.”

So is Geek Chic here to stay? “Who knows what’s cool anymore?” says Carell. “It’s not cool to be uncool, but it is also not cool to be cool. It’s cool to be somewhere in between. There is this gray area that is most all of us.”

I’m so uncool I’m almost cool again! That’s so totally boss!!!

How ya like me now, suckas? Posted by Picasa

2 comments August 17th, 2005 at 09:23pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Coolness,Movies,TV

I Wonder How Much Rogaine I Would Need To Cover My Entire Body…

I’m not really sure I buy this, but it certainly sounds encouraging…

Forget waxed chests and rock-hard abs. A new survey finds ladies like their men scruffy, a wee bit chubby – and definitely not a metrosexual.

Playgirl asked 2,000 of its readers what they find sexy in a man and the answers were surprising: 42% said they thought love handles were kind of sexy and 47% approved of chest hair.


[O]nly 4% of women said the size of a man’s wallet mattered. Metrosexuals are also out: 73% want a guy who is “rough around the edges.”

“This survey shows that the guy who’s most attractive to our readers is not your average Hollywood hunk,” said Playgirl editrix Jill Sieracki. “It’s the average Joe who came up on top. Women are practical about their choices, and they’re smart.”

Well, two outta three ain’t bad…

4 comments August 17th, 2005 at 08:59pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Coolness,Polls

Wingnuts Against Bush

I mainly read the New York Daily News for sports, but I do skim their online front page. Occasionally I’ll notice a blurb for an op-ed column by Michael Goodwin, and it’s almost always full of virulent right-wing bile that verges on parody. They have another columnist named Michael Daly who leans in the other direction, but I can never remember which Michael is which until I see their headshot or read some text.

Well, today I started reading a column by one of the Michaels, and the picture was loading slowly, and I was absolutely sure that it had to be the “good” Michael, since it was talking about how Cindy Sheehan was majorly harshing President Tough Guy’s mellow. Much to my surprise, I was wrong. The wild-eyed right-wing columnist was the one saying:

Sheehan lost her son Casey in Iraq and now the President is paying the piper. He is a hostage to Sheehan’s little band of protesters camped near his ranch in Crawford, Tex. This is not how the President wanted to spend his vacation. He has only himself to blame. Bush’s decision to spend a full month in Texas was stunningly stupid. With Americans turning solidly against the war – a Newsweek poll reported a mere 34% now approve of his handling of Iraq – the President looks callous when the nation needs reassuring. And he could be losing his last bit of leverage over public opinion. Put it this way: no support, no war.

Now he’s stuck in Texas with Sheehan. If he meets with her, as she demands, she wins. If he cuts his visit short and scurries back to Washington, she wins. If he stays, she also wins, as she did yesterday.


Bush can’t win against a grieving, articulate, angry mother who’s willing to spend August in a roadside ditch publicizing her cause. Each new casualty in Iraq adds to her power and subtracts from his.

There is a chance that Sheehan is just the media flavor of the month. But I wouldn’t bet on it. This feels like a turning point. It’s happened before.

He does take a bunch of cheap shots at the usual targets like Michael Moore and Howard Dean and the liberal anti-war media, but still. Whoa.

August 17th, 2005 at 08:03pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Bush,Cindy Sheehan,Iraq,Media,Politics,War

Rush Almost Gets It!


LIMBAUGH: I mean, Cindy Sheehan is just Bill Burkett. Her story is nothing more than forged documents. There’s nothing about it that’s real, including the mainstream media’s glomming onto it. It’s not real. It’s nothing more than an attempt. It’s the latest effort made by the coordinated left.

You’re in the right ballpark grammatically, Rush. But Casey Sheehan’s death wasn’t a lie – it was for a lie. I really hope Cindy asks Rush just what exactly he meant by this.

Hat tip to four legs good in Eschaton comments for the quote!

August 17th, 2005 at 12:22am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Cindy Sheehan,Iraq,Media,Politics,Wankers

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