Archive for July 7th, 2006

Movies To Watch For

Well. The shadowy and mysterious Codename V. has advised me of her intent to watch BloodRayne, directed by crappy-videogame-adaptation master Uwe Boll, and urged me to check out his IMDb filmography, so that I might more fully appreciate his genius.

Already under his belt: The aforementioned BloodRayne, House of the Dead, and Alone in the Dark (I don’t think I even want to know what German Fried Movie is…).

In the works: Adaptations of Dungeon Siege, Far Cry, and… Postal. The game’s premise is basically what you would think: Postal worker goes nutzoid. And why am I singling it out for special attention? Because it has Gary Coleman in it.

I repeat: A postal-worker-rampage movie with Gary Coleman in it. (Alas, I don’t think he’s the one who goes on the rampage.) As V. observes, this is surely Quality, and she would know. Coming next year to a video store near you.

10 comments July 7th, 2006 at 06:50pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Coolness,Movies,Weirdness

Token Up

This post by TRex at firedoglake a couple of nights ago, and the angry comments about stereotyping that it inspired, reminded me of something I have long suspected but have only blogged about briefly (I think).

TRex and the commenters circled around this, but I don’t think anyone said it directly: It is not a coincidence that the women and minorities who are prominent conservatives are unusually vile and unqualified – it is by design.

I believe that the conservatives actively seek out, recruit, and cultivate these people, not just to apply a thin layer of I-Can’t-Believe-It’s-Not-Diversity on top of their Wonderbread movement, but to provide endless opportunities to accuse their opposition of the very hatefulness that is their stock in trade.

Some examples:

Democrats opposing Clarence Thomas for being a sleazy sexual harasser? A lynch mob.

Liberals/Democrats pointing out, repeatedly, that Condi Rice is criminally incompetent? Racist, sexist, and possibly homophobic.

Liberals jumping all over Michelle Maglalang (or something) for her hypocrisy about Teresa Heinz Kerry’s “professional name” when she uses one herself? Racist and sexist.

Liberal outrage at Ann Coulter over… jeez, who can keep track? Yeah, definitely sexist, yeah.

Liberals making a fuss about a gay prostitute in the White House press corps (possibly sleeping over as well)? Homophobic.

Liberals bashing Israel’s increasingly sadistic Palestinian policy, neocons, or Joe Lieberman (and don’t try to tell me he hasn’t been cultivated by the Republicans)? Anti-semitic (I’m Jewish, by the way – but perhaps I’m self-hating).

Even the failed nomination of the laughably unqualified Harriet Miers to the SCOTUS (that really happened – I didn’t just dream it, right?) was used as an example of liberal sexism, even though it was Republicans who ultimately shot her down.

To some extent, we play into the Republicans’ hands every time we so much as mention their race, sex, or orientation while attacking them (although it’s kinda the whole point in Gannon’s case). However, the sad fact is that even if we scrupulously referred to, say, Ramesh Ponnuru or John Yoo as snivelling, sadistic little cockroaches without ever once mentioning their race, we would still be accused of racism, even if that is precisely what we are attacking them for. Such is the opportunistic illogic of the Republicans and their captive media.

Believe me, I am no civility advocate, even if I don’t swear much on this blog (what can I say, my Dad reads it). If you want to curse these fuckers out, feel free. But just remember that they are trying to bait you. They want to collect and display as many samples of liberal “intolerance” as they can, the higher-profile the better. Don’t make it easy for them. Besides, it’s not like there isn’t a wealth of material to work with – why waste time on cheap shots that are beside the point, which is not that Coulter and Malkin are women, but that they are evil.

One additional recommendation: Keep a bunch of minority, women’s, and gay rights issues in your back pocket to wave at the conservative flying monkeys whenever they start insincerely protesting their compassion for the oppressed. Surely they should be willing to go on record with their support of gay marriage to prove that they’re the tolerant ones, right? Or at least to condemn the Right’s shabby treatment of women like Cindy Sheehan and Valerie Plame. Or ask them how the glorious liberation of the women of Afghanistan and Iraq is coming along.

7 comments July 7th, 2006 at 12:06pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Favorites,Politics,Racism,Republicans,Sexism,Teh Gay,Wankers

Friday Quote & Cat Blogging

This week’s quote is from What’s Up, Tiger Lily?, Woody Allen’s quasi-experimental first film, where he dubbed his own comic dialogue over that of a Japanese action B-movie. Funny stuff.

You’d better not mess with me unless you’re all completely unashamed of your bodies!

And, of course, there’ll be other people’s cats…


Gollum looking vaguely perplexed. Posted by Picasa

3 comments July 7th, 2006 at 07:41am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Friday Quote & Cat Blogging


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