Archive for December 27th, 2006

Celebrity Dead Pool

Well, The Kenosha Kid has tagged me with a morbid meme:

1. Pick ten celebrities who you think will die in from 1/1/07 to 1/1/08
2. You aren’t allowed to murder the celebrity.
2.5 Saddam Hussein doesn’t count.
3. The point system works like this: you get one point for every year UNDER the age of 90 that the celebrity dies at. Anyone over 90 gets negative points.
4. Whoever gets the most points, wins.

It’ll frankly be a miracle if I get any points at all, but I’ll take a stab at it. In no particular order:

1. Courtney Love
2. Larry Flynt
3. Andy Dick
4. Pete Doherty (sorry, Jenny)
5. Whitey Ford
6. Fats Domino
7. Henry Kissinger
8. Bob Feller
9. Mickey Rooney
10. Fidel Castro

I’ll just tag the shadowy and mysterious Codename V, who likes these sort of things.

9 comments December 27th, 2006 at 10:27pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Memes

Moody Prince Spamlet

Just a small excerpt from today’s spam, entitled “upholstery”:

It’ s really hard to say as Herpes dosen’t always “act” the same! It proved a serious step forward in using hydrogen as a potential energy source for cars, while showing defects that make the concept a clear work in progress.

Who knew herpes could be so useful?

4 comments December 27th, 2006 at 01:01pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Spamoptikon

Wednesday Why-I-Love-The-Weekly-World-News Blogging

(Is that Bruce Campbell?)

The Swiss are precise about everything:

BIENNE, Switzerland — Here in the world’s watchmaking capital, five o’clock shadow appears on men’s faces at precisely five o’clock, according to a new study by the Swiss Health Council.

“It’s nothing new in this country,” said Dr. Pascal Schmid, who has reviewed centuries of Swiss medical literature.

Dr. Schmid traces the timely stubble to Geneva in the 1500s, when the unfamiliar din of clocktower bells literally scared the hair out of men’s faces during working hours.

In more recent years, the depilatory effects of glow-in-the-dark radium dial paint spread for miles around timepiece factories.

“At closing time, workers sealed the paint away in sturdy cabinets, and facial hair was free to grow again,” Dr. Schmid explained.

Nowadays, exposure to the pulsing electric fields from Switzerland’s countless modern watches affects the release of human epidermal growth factor — a protein controlling hair length.

“Until recently, none of this was thought to cause any wider genetic mutations,” Schmid said. “However, we’re looking at evidence that quartz and radium exposure may have affected the Swiss gene pool.”

“We’re seeing a lot of babies born with asymmetrical limbs in this country–usually a little hand and a big hand,” he said.

Behind every cliche, there is always some very solid and reputable science.

4 comments December 27th, 2006 at 11:41am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Weekly World News

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