Never Thought I’d Say This, But…

3 comments June 5th, 2007at 11:06am Posted by Eli

Dude, maybe you should go to the strip club:

A bow-brained insurance broker fired arrows wildly into the night from his Manhattan apartment, shattering a woman’s terrace door and landing himself in jail, cops said yesterday.

The shaken neighbor, Serena Fogel, said that when she pulled up the blinds in her E. 81st St. home after she awoke about 11a.m. Sunday she found a peanut-shaped hole in the glass door.

“I’ve had a lot of meshugas in my life, but I didn’t know what it was,” the retired teacher said. “I’m glad to be alive.”

Fogel called police after finding a metal arrow on the kitchen floor. Cops found two more arrows burrowed into scaffolding at an E. 80th St. building, and turned their sights across the street to 39-year-old Noel Lauria’s fourth-floor apartment, police said.

Lauria admitted he fired the arrows, but explained he was shooting into a heavy-duty target block placed on the windowsill when some “got away” from him Saturday night.

“My intention was not to pick off somebody. My intentions were to have a good time,” Lauria said. “I’m turning 40. It’s an elegant instrument. Rather than going to strip clubs, I like to go [shooting].”


He was arraigned on reckless endangerment and other charges yesterday and released without bail.

The urban archer visited with Fogel last night and presented a letter of apology – and a $400 check for the damaged door.

“Serena, I’m very, very sorry,” he said.

“I accept your apology, but why did you do that?” the tearful woman asked before they embraced.

Lauria told the Daily News he decided to continue shooting after the arrows slipped through the window because he had not heard them hit anything, and figured no one was hurt.

He also said he believed only two arrows escaped him.

“I have a target that I use, and unfortunately, two of them got away from me,” he said. “I meant no harm.”

I can’t imagine what this doofus might have been thinking. I guess some people just aren’t cut out for urban living.

Entry Filed under: Wankers,Weirdness


  • 1. Valley Girl  |  June 5th, 2007 at 11:40 pm

    Eli, thanks for the laugh!

  • 2. low cost auto insurance&hellip  |  January 30th, 2008 at 1:45 pm

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  • 3. golden reef casino online&hellip  |  July 19th, 2008 at 1:44 am

    golden reef casino online…

    scorching.bowline revive Berman …

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