Archive for August 17th, 2007

Just Trying To Be Helpful

The NY Daily News has some useful Dos & Don’ts for Jenna Bush’s fiance:


• Encourage your father-in-law to take advantage of the open bar at your wedding. Same goes for the bride.

• Make plans for the month of August until at least 2030. You’ll be vacationing on the Bush family ranch in Crawford, Tex. Ribs, rodeos and those line-dancing routines may grow on you – eventually.

• Go hunting with Dick Cheney. Even if it means a weekend pass from Crawford.

• Hang a “Mission Accomplished” sign outside the honeymoon suite.

• Gripe about your father-in-law’s nickname for you, even if it’s “Hanky.”


• Take a class in the Heimlich maneuver in case of another pretzel scare. Laura, at least, will thank you.

• Speak to Dad in two-syllable words – max. And learn to pronounce “nuclear” as “nucular,” so you don’t show him up.

• Demand that your friends surrender their photos of you smoking pot or mooning the camera -before they wind up in the National Enquirer.

• Stick by your cronies through thick, thin and thinner, no matter how much they embarrass you.

• Remember at all times who “The Decider” is, even if the question is “grilled or crispy?”

Listen to the Daily News, dude. They’re a Newspaper.

2 comments August 17th, 2007 at 10:16pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Bush

Brave New Word

I’ve inspired a new word!

You’ve probably seen this happen – or, if you’re less lucky, been the person it happened to. A group of people are standing around discussing some topic where either expertise or native intelligence make them all pretty conversant on the subject. Suddenly, one person pipes up with what he clearly thinks is a profound insight, an important observation. The others smile awkwardly, perhaps exchanging quick meaningful looks, and attempt to steer the conversation elsewhere. In the most embarrassing cases, the person who offered the observation is convinced that the full import of his insight can’t have been understood, and insists upon pressing it again and again. What’s actually happened, though, is that the person has outed himself as desperately behind the curve by offering the very opposite of an insight: some utterly elementary point that everyone else had taken for granted as a premise of the conversation, and indeed, one too obvious to be worth stating among (so they had thought) other reasonably bright and informed people. It’s an odd case of making oneself look bad, not by saying something wrong or false, but by saying something too clearly true. Because it simultaneously evokes “outing,” “on the outs,” and the contrast with “insight,” I decided I’d go with “outsight” as the name for this. So, formally…

outsight, n: A statement believed by the person who utters it to be an important or profound insight, but which is in fact regarded by its audience as so obvious or elementary that it reveals the speaker as hopelessly ignorant or slow-witted, at least relative to the relevant group.

If it weren’t for outsights, I would be completely ‘sightless.

(h/t The Opinionator)

2 comments August 17th, 2007 at 05:37pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Uncategorized

Wiki Edit Of The Day

Dude, Where’s My Job Title?

From The All-Seeing Eye Of Froomkin’s roundup of Wiki edits from (apparently) White House staffers:

Some were amusing, like of this West Wing page, changing the description of Pete Seat from “Special Assistant to The President and Press Assistant (Slide Show specialist)” to “Dude.”


2 comments August 17th, 2007 at 02:37pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Quotes,Republicans

Wanker Of The Day

The inimitable and apparently unshameable Michael Gerson:

…[Rove’s] background in direct mail, along with the experience he gained while converting Lyndon Johnson’s Texas into a Republican stronghold, has given him a comprehensive understanding of the technologies and trends of politics.

But in several years as a colleague, I found Rove to be the most unusual political operative I have ever known; so exceptional he doesn’t belong in the category. His most passionate, obsessive love — after his wife — is American history…. And from American history Rove knows: Events are not moved primarily by techniques; they are moved by ideas.

Rove’s main influence on the Republican Party has not been a series of tactical innovations but a series of strategic arguments. In this way, Rove is the opposite of a cynical political operator. He is not only a partisan for George W. Bush but the most serious, tireless advocate of Bushism.

Yep, you read that right: Karl is not a dirty trickster and manipulator, but a bold, big-picture visionary.

First, Rove argues that Republicans win as activist reformers, in the tradition of Lincoln, McKinley and Theodore Roosevelt. “We were founded as a reformist party,” he said in our conversation this week, “not to be against something, but to help the little guy get ahead.”

My head just exploded.

The models he cites are 401(k)s and the mortgage interest deduction — government policies that encouraged individual wealth and ownership. Then Rove spent several minutes describing, with wonkish delight, the momentum and virtues of health savings accounts, a Bush-era innovation allowing individuals to save tax-free for routine medical expenses.

Hey, I think you left out bankruptcy reform, dude.

The activist use of government to help individuals get ahead may not sound controversial. Among Republicans, it is.

No it isn’t. They’re all opposed to it. The only disagreement is on how far to go in pretending otherwise.

Rove’s other two Brilliant Strategerical Ideas are that you can appeal to the base and reach out to the middle with stuff like the prescription drug benefit and immigration reform (yeah, those both worked out really well…); and that the GOP needs to reach out to minorities (or at least to socially conservative minority churchgoers who can be swayed by homophobia and faith-based initiative cash).

But the conclusion is the best part:

t is sometimes alleged that Rove’s arguments have not fully prevailed in the GOP — which is true. It is further alleged that these arguments have been discredited by events — which is not true. The complications of Iraq have obscured Rove’s victories, not undone them. And his key historical insight is unavoidable: Republicans win as conservative reformers.

Yes, that’s right: Karl Rove did not fail the Republican Party; the Republican Party failed Karl Rove.

August 17th, 2007 at 11:52am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Politics,Republicans,Rove,Wankers

Random B&W NYC Photoblogging

Just some random, semi-bizarre stuff from NYC:

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A fountain sculpture downtown.

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Another view of the fountain sculpture.

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Umm, a sofa.

August 17th, 2007 at 11:32am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: NJ/NYC,Photoblogging

Qaereer Opportunities

Bizarre Padilla tidbit from jurassicpork:

… the best piece of evidence they had was a five page al Qaida application that federal prosecutors claimed contained his fingerprints.

By way of Bigezbear, who is as bemused as I am at the thought of an al Qaeda HR department:

There’s an application you have to fill out to be a terrorist? Do you dress up in a nice suit and tie for the interview?

I think the only difference is in whether or not you should check off the “Have you ever been convicted of a felony?” box.

And if you do get hired, be advised that “You have been chosen for a martyrdom operation! Allah be praised!” replaces “We’ve decided to go in a different direction.”

1 comment August 17th, 2007 at 11:13am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Terrorism,Weirdness

Friday Quote & Cat Blogging

This week’s quote is from Robin Williams’ underappreciated megaflop, Toys:

Well, red usually means caution… or beef, if it’s a boullion cube.

And, of course, there’ll be other people’s cartoons about cats:

Yes you are!  And you�re sitting there!  Hi, kitty!
From xkcd.

I also liked the “hover text”: “Yes you are! And you’re sitting there! Hi, kitty!”

August 17th, 2007 at 07:32am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Friday Quote & Cat Blogging

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