Wednesday Why-I-Love-The-Weekly-World-News Blogging

January 23rd, 2008at 07:18am Posted by Eli

The Weekly World News uncovers NASA’s secret shame!

(By Mike Foster)

A creepy photo NASA has suppressed for decades proves that Apollo astronauts who landed on the moon were affected by the powerful lunar rays – and turned into werewolves!

The shocking picture, leaked by a space agency insider, shows a helmeted astronaut standing on the surface of the moon with wolf-like hair covering his entire face.

Controversial St. Louis astronomer Dr. Bernard Muselfreed, who received the mind-blowing photo from an unnamed NASA source, calls the bizarre image enlightening.

“We know that moonlight can cause some individuals on Earth to become lycanthropes,” he says. “It’s only logical that a person actually standing on the lunar surface and exposed to even more intense rays would be likely to undergo such a transformation.”

NASA’s reasons for keeping the eye-popping photo from the public are obvious. “Winning the space race by landing a man on the moon was a major propaganda victory for the United States,” notes aerospace historian Bob Dressel. “Certainly, news that or space heroes were turning into werewolves would have marred that success.”

Because the photo is undated, Dr. Muselfreed says it’s impossible to be sure which of the Apollo astronauts… is pictured.

But that’s irrelevant, he maintains, because “almost certainly” every man who walked on the moon spent minutes – or in some cases hours – as a werewolf.

“I believe that Neil Armstrong, the first human to walk on the moon… turned into a werewolf within moments of his arrival,” Dr. Muselfreed declares.

“We know that Armstrong almost immediately became disoriented, botching the line that had been carefully written for him – ‘One small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind’ – and uttering instead the nonsensical ‘One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.’

“What few Americans know is that Armstrong’s speech deteriorated rapidly and moments later Mission Control heard what sounded like growls coming over the radio.

“At the time, this was dismissed as ‘static,’ but in light of this remarkable photograph, an educated guess would be that the astronaut was turning into a wolfman.”

Seven independent photo analysts who’ve examined the picture confirm its authenticity. While refusing to brand the photo an outright hoax, a NASA spokesman dismissed the werewolf report as “an exaggeration.”

Well, I guess that does all fit together, although I’m a bit unclear as to exactly what “lunar rays” are…

Entry Filed under: Weekly World News

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