Major-League Hitting Secret Revealed!

May 17th, 2008at 03:13pm Posted by Eli

This is just wrong…

The key to turning the Yankees season around could be under Jason Giambi’s pinstriped pants.

The Yankee slugger revealed Friday he slips on a gold lamé thong with a flame-line waistband when he’s trying to get out of a hitting slump – and he’s shared it with his teammates.

“It works every time,” Giambi told the Daily News after his secret was outed on Portfolio.com.

Derek Jeter agreed that Giambi’s thong works, although “it’s so uncomfortable running around the bases.”

“I had it over my shorts and stuff,” he said. “I was 0-for-32 and I hit a homer on the first pitch. That’s the only time I’ve ever worn it.”

Johnny Damon also admitted donning the golden panties “probably three times.”

“I may need to wear it again soon,” said Damon, who is batting a mediocre .255.

What is the secret of Giambi’s golden thong?

“You’re not worrying about your hands or your balance at the plate,” Damon said. “You’re worried about the uncomfortable feeling you’re receiving.”

In the earlier interview with Portfolio.com, Giambi claimed he also hung his thong in the lockers of teammates Bernie Williams, Robin Ventura and Robinson Cano when they had trouble generating runs.

“I only put it on when I’m desperate to get out of a big slump,” Giambi said.

(…)

“Whoever is on slumps, puts it on,” catcher Jorge Posada admitted yesterday. “I don’t know if it works. I haven’t worn it yet.”

Posada added that “a lot of players have worn it,” but he didn’t name names. Asked if the thong got washed between wearings, he gave a cringe-worthy answer. “Ask Jason,” said Posada. “Jason is a little strange.”

The Daily News also reported that they provided thongs to all the Yankee players and the manager to try to break the team out of its slump, but it’s probably only Giambi’s thong that has the Special Thong Hitting Magick in it.

Entry Filed under: Sports,Weirdness


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