Archive for March 11th, 2009

Second-Least Surprising Story Of The Month

Americans don’t like Rush Limbaugh:

The following data is based on a national Democracy Corps survey of 1,000 2008 voters (830 landline, 170 cell phone weighted; 880 landline, 120 cell phone unweighted) conducted March 5 through 8, 2009. Margin of error: 3.1 percent. Some data shown reflects results from 830 likely 2010 voters (863 unweighted; margin of error 3.4 percent).

A Question of Limbaugh’s Republican Leadership

  • After McCain and Gingrich, Limbaugh seen as among most influential to Republican Party:
John McCain 38%
Newt Gingrich 25%
Rush Limbaugh 24%
Others 78%
Respondents were allowed to choose two Republican leaders in this question.

Americans’ Views of Limbaugh

  • 57 % feel Rush Limbaugh “does not share my values”
Shares Values Doesn’t Share
Conservative Republicans 66% 25%
Moderate/Liberal Republican 39% 39%
Moderate/Conservative Dems 13% 77%
Liberal Democrats 10% 86%

Here’s what I wanna know: Who the hell are the 10% of liberal Democrats who think Rush Limbaugh shares their values?  They either don’t know who Rush is, or they don’t know who they are.

March 11th, 2009 at 10:20pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Politics,Polls,Republicans

Least Surprising Story Of The Month

No-one could have anticipated…

Sarah Palin‘s 18-year-old daughter Bristol has reportedly broken off her engagement with Levi Johnston, the father of her 2-month-old son Tripp….

But in a new interview with Star Magazine, Levi’s sister Mercede Johnston says Bristol actually broke up with Levi more than a month ago, is not attending school and rarely lets her baby daddy see their young son. Mercede also says Bristol even told him that she hates him and, when she learned she was pregnant, wished the baby wasn’t his.


Said Mercede: “Levi tries to visit Tripp every single day, but Bristol makes it nearly impossible for him. She tells him he can’t take the baby to our house because she doesn’t want him around ‘white trash.’ She treats him so badly!”

If two teenagers forced together by political expedience can’t make it, what chance do the rest of us have?

March 11th, 2009 at 09:15pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Palin,Politics

Weirdest RNC Chair Ever?

Certainly the most self-destructive…

Very weird quote from chairman of the Republican National Committee Michael Steele.

Mr. Steele said he is in stage two of a two-stage process to reform and transform the Republican Party. He won’t reveal details, because, “The mice who are scurrying about the Hill are upset because they no longer have access to the cheese, so they don’t know what’s going on.” He says his process has been “insular” because he doesn’t want people “pontificating” on his decisions or second-guessing them before they are made.”

Sounds like stage two of a two-stage process to get himself fired. While it’s not 100% clear who Steele is referring to, it’s difficult to read this – in context – as anything other than a reference to his GOP critics on the Hill. Not very smart.

Stage one, of course, was criticizing Emperor Limbaugh, then immediately groveling for forgiveness – which is a good way to alienate both the Limbaugh-lovers and the Limbaugh-haters.

Time to break out the popcorn.  Or GOPcorn, as the case may be.

March 11th, 2009 at 07:39pm Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Politics,Republicans,Weirdness

Wednesday Why-I-Love-The-Weekly-World-News Blogging

Weekly World News tracks the latest culinary trends:

With an ever worsening economic climate, millions are turning to recipes from the Great Depression to help save money. Dozens of websites have sprung up offering authentic tips and suggestions from the countries darkest days.

Bankers and other unemployed people around the country are turning to sites that offer instructions like; how to boil leather from a shoe, tips on panhandling, and the secret language of hobo symbols.  One site tells you how to boil a shoe, catch small game with the laces, then make shoelace spaghetti turning one pair of worn out sneakers into a delicious meal for four.  Other sites recommend spiking your pasta with crushed vitamins or Paxil to help feel more satisfied by your meal.


Stores are seeing a demand for inexpensive products like fatback, lard, and gruel.  Scientists with the FDA are still unsure what gruel is made of.  One grocery manager had to renew his stock of pigs feet for the first time in twenty-five years.

“I think finally people weren’t buying them ironically, or as a dare.”

Other meals seeing a renewed popularity include:

Braised cow tongue

Porcupine Casserole

Chicken Skin Fritters

Minced Testicle Pie

Collards and ‘The back of my hand if you ask for seconds!’

And a Sweet and Sour Soup made with water, ketchup, and your shattered dreams for a better life.

The last three are my favorites.

1 comment March 11th, 2009 at 11:13am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Weekly World News

Creationists At The Smithsonian

This is surreal on so many levels…

Every winter, David DeWitt takes his biology class to the Smithsonian’s National Museum of Natural History, but for a purpose far different from that of other professors.

DeWitt brings his Advanced Creation Studies class (CRST 390, Origins) up from Liberty University in Lynchburg, Va., hoping to strengthen his students’ belief in a biblical view of natural history, even in the lion’s den of evolution.

Advanced Creation Studies?  I have a hard time imagining what such a class would be like.

“Hey, what’d you have for #12 on the midterm?”


“Hey, me too!  What about #27?”


“Wow, it’s like we’re psychic twins or something!”

His yearly visit to the Smithsonian is part of a wider movement by creationists to confront Darwinism in some of its most redoubtable secular strongholds. As scientists celebrate the 200th anniversary of Charles Darwin’s birth, his doubters are taking themselves on Genesis-based tours of natural history museums, aquariums, geologic sites and even dinosaur parks.


A 2006 poll by the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life found that 42 percent of Americans believe humans have always existed in their present form. At universities such as Liberty, founded by the late Jerry Falwell, those views inform the entire science curriculum.

We’re doomed.

1 comment March 11th, 2009 at 07:11am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Education,Religion,Science,Weirdness

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