Archive for March 22nd, 2009

Shark Alert!

Multi Medium Public Service Announcement: Today the Sci-Fi Syfy Channel is airing not one, but two craptastic shark movies that have been brilliantly reviewed by the shadowy and mysterious Codename V:

At 5PM, we have Shark Attack 3: Megalodon:

The next day, the marine biologist (who is seriously fugly and according to the IMDb has been in some soft-core porn) goes out on a boat with a couple of sleazy male assistants who constantly sexually harass her, but you’re supposed to like all three characters anyway. Megalodon starts ramming the boat, despite the fact that nobody in the immediate vicinity is having sex. Maybe those guys’ sleazy comments were enough to attract his attention.

And at 9PM, we have Spring Break Shark Attack:

Meanwhile, Studious Charlie is riding around in a small boat full of mangled plastic sea turtles. What could be responsible for this mangling? Conclusion: SHARKS!

The next day, they’re all keen to get off the island. They run across the mangled torso of the missing other sleazy gigolo boy. He’s covered in teeth marks and looks even more plastic than the sea turtles. Conclusion: SHARKS!

Having watched both of these films myself, I can attest that they are every bit as awesome as V. describes.

March 22nd, 2009 at 11:56am Posted by Eli

Entry Filed under: Coolness,Movies


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