March 2nd, 2011at 06:29pm Posted by Eli
Weekly World News gets the scoop on Charlie Sheen’s new publicist:
Veteran Hollywood publicist Stan Rosenfield, who represented Charlie Sheen through the actor’s rehab attempts and breakup with his employers on the hit sitcom “Two and a Half Men,” abruptly resigned on Monday.
Charlie Sheen called Rosenfeld a “pussy” and then immediately hired Xv Y’uuu, an alien from Planet Zeeba. Xv Y’uu stepped right in and is handling all Charlie’s affairs in a manner that Charlie likes.
“Y’uuu is a winner. Y’uuu is a rock star. He’s a rock star working a rock star and together we are going to Go Alien on CBS and take the whole network down. As a matter of fact, we might just take down all of Hollywood. We’re going to sue the whole town. You don’t treat the gold that I am like this.”
Asked where he met Y’uuu, Sheen said, “I’ve known Y’uuu for years. There are aliens living amongst us people. Don’t you see them. Y’uuu has been a good friend and couldn’t be happier that he’s handling my press now. We are going to napalm Hollywood!”
Y’uuu was busy firing off emails from his brain, so he was not available to talk to WWN.
It’s a match made in the heavens.
Entry Filed under: Weekly World News